英語小笑話幽默

英語小笑話幽默

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時間:2019-03-24

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1、THEBOSSOnedayamangoestoapetshoptobuyaparrot.Theassistanttakesthemantotheparrotsectionandasksthemantochooseone.Themanasks,HHowmuchistheyellowone?nTheassistantsays,H$2000.HThemanisshockedandaskstheassistantwhyit'ssoexpensive.Theassistantexplains,"Thisparrotisaveryspecialone.Heknowstypewritingandcan

2、typereallyfast/1"Whataboutthegreenone?"themanasks.Theassistantsays,nHecosts$5000becauseheknowstypewritingandcananswerincomingtelephonecallsandtakesnotes.n"Whatabouttheredone?"themanasks.Theassistantsays,"Thatone's$10,000."Themansays,"WhatdoesHEdo?nTheassistantsays,HIdonftknow,buttheothertwocallhi

3、mboss."BEAUTIFUL?Therewasalawyerandhewasjustwakingupfromanesthesiaaftersurgery,andhiswifewassittingbyhisside?Hiseyesflutteredopenandhesaid,"YouTebeautiful!"andthenhefellasleepagain.Hiswifehadneverheardhimsaythatsoshestayedbyhisside?Acoupleminuteslaterhiseyesflutteredopenandhesaid"You'recute!"Well

4、,thewifewasdissapointedbecauseinsteadof"beautiful"itwas"cute."Shesaid"Whathappenedto'beautiful,?Hisreplywas"Thedrugsarewearingoff!”CONSTRUCTIONCODEAconstructionworkeronthethirdfloorofabuildingneedsahandsaw.Heseesoneofthelaborersonthefirstfloorandyellsdowntohim,butthemanindicatesthathecan'thear.So

5、,theguyonthethirdfloortriestousesigns.Hepointstohiseye,meaning,nrthenathisknee,meaning,nneedn,thenhemoveshishandbackandforth,meaning,nhandsawH.Themanonthefirstfloornods,thendropshispantsandbeginstomasturbate?Themanonthethirdfloorfreaksoutandrunsdowntothefirstflooryelling,HWhatthehelliswrongwithy

6、ou!?!Areyoustupidorsomething?IwassayingthatIneededahandsaw!nThelaborerlooksatthecarpenterandsays,nIknewthat.IwasjusttryingtotellyouthatIwascoming/1CONSTRUCTIONEARAconstructionworkeraccidentallycutsoffoneofhisearswithanelectricsaw?Hecallsouttoaguywalkingonthestreetbelow,"Hey,doyouseemyeardownthere

7、?nTheguyonthestreetpicksupanear,"Isthisit?n"No,"repliestheconstructionworker,nminehadapencilbehindit.nFOODFORTHEHUNGRYThreedriftersareroamingthecountrysideforsometime.Theycomeuponasmallfarmhousewithcropsplantedaroundit

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